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My Child Won't listen
My child won't listen
When parents say, "My child doesn't listen," they usually mean the child doesn't do what he/she is told.  Defiant and Stubborn are other words which may describe these behaviors.  Is your child defiant? That is, does he refuse to do what you tell him to; does she dig in her heels and pout?  Would you say your child is stubbornIf you answered yes without having to stop to think, it's likely that your child has a genetic temperament trait called Nonadaptability. This trait can be a wonderful gift or a difficult challenge depending upon the situation.
Copyright 2011 Dr. Robin Hegvik:  Behavior Specialist.  All Rights Reserved.

Experienced Parenting Coach

I have worked with nonadaptable children at home and in schools for over 30 years and find them to be delightful given the right environmental management. As a parenting coach, I'd like to share my Tricks of the Trade (TM) which can quickly soften your relationship with your child and lead to less turmoil in your family.
What is Nonadaptability?
As any parent of more than one child knows, the temperament of children can be very different. Nonadaptability is one of many temperament traits. Some children find it easy to do what other people ask. They go with the flow. We refer to these children as Adaptable. Other children have a hard time stopping what they're doing to do what you or someone else wants them to do. They seem to get locked in. It takes time and effort for them to move to the next task. About 10-20% of children need a lot of help changing from what they're doing to what you want. We say they are Slow to Adapt or Nonadaptable. These children often have temper tantrums, especially if they are also Negative and Intense, and you have just said "No." 
Children who are nonadaptable can be a challenge in some situations and a gift in others − it all depends on how the situation is managed. By mentoring/coaching parents through the five-step ADAPT Process© and helping them learn the Tricks of the Trade©, I can smooth the way from a day fraught with tensions and strife to one which sails smoothly. I also provide experienced services as an ADHD counselor for parents and children struggling with the challenges this condition can cause.

To find out more about your child's temperament: Call me 302-345-7819 Or Email
Challenging Behaviors of Nonadaptable Children

Many behaviors, along with nonadaptability.  Which of these behaviors does your child have?

  • has a hard time changing from what he is doing to what you wanted to do
  • "No" can trigger a battle or a temper tantrum
  • get locked into a particular point of view
  • hard to coax out a forbidden activity
  • often bossy and/or tattles
  • hates surprises
  • has a hard time sharing, appears selfish
  • hates being told what to do
  • has a strong sense of what she wants
  • often gets into trouble during unstructured times
  • has a hard time adjusting to the new school year
Tricks of the Trade

Gifts of Nonadaptable Children
Gifts of Nonadaptable Children